For most of us, getting married is something you dream about as a little girl. You see the white dress, the veil, the flowers - but most of us don’t visualize a bump under all that tulle.

Life happens out of order sometimes, and that’s okay! Planning a COVID-safe micro wedding as a pregnant bride certainly wasn’t the day I had pictured, but it was magical nonetheless. If you find yourself planning a special day with a little one on the way, read through for some big lessons I learned during the process.

Take the wins and shrug off the losses

Being a more unconventional love story, there were a few people in our lives that didn’t find us “worthy” of being celebrated. At the end of the day, when people don’t show up the way you’d hoped, it’s more likely about them then anything about you. At the same time, we were surrounded by so much love & support from others that made us feel so grateful. We focused our energies on all that excitement and tried our best to avoid harping on any negativity. Our marriage was going to be about love & joy, and others could get on board or get off. That might look like setting uncomfortable boundaries, but in all honesty, pregnancy and postpartum are THE times in your life where you can practice boundary setting as often as you need. You have to protect your energy, and you get to set the tone about how people treat and interact with you. There’s no shame in that!

All about the dress

I’ll be honest, most maternity bridal out there will make you depressed to be a pregnant bride. I’ve always enjoyed fashion, and being pigeonholed into a “beachy boho” empire waist or bust was a HUGE bummer.

Take the opportunity to think outside the box. Your wedding is already untraditional, so why stick to the wedding dress convention? I ended up going with a non-maternity formal dress with a loose fit and ordered one month in advance to best estimate the size of my bump. I made it feel more bridal by adding a veil and some ‘something blue’ shoes. Being a small wedding due to Covid regulations anyways, I didn’t mind that it wasn’t a super long train or conventionally bridal looking. It felt more me than any maternity dress I’d seen!

Consider non-maternity wear, alternative colours, siloettes, and really think outside the tradition. You can always accessorize with a more traditional look if that’s important to you, or screw it all together. At the end of the day, you want to feel like YOU, so bring your personal style into the day, even if it’s not what typical maternity has to offer.

Pregnancy Energy

I got married in the last week of my second trimester and was already feeling large, uncomfortable and fatigued for 90% of the day. I really viewed my wedding as an athletic event and in the days prior, fuelled my body as an athlete would. We only had a ceremony and photos, so it’s not like I was preparing for a long night of dancing, but I still wanted to be comfortable and not totally burnt out before the wedding night!

Get a good nights sleep. If your partner is keeping you up, consider splurging on a hotel with blackout curtains. Don’t forget to pack your pregnancy pillow!
Eat strategically. Many brides forget to eat well before their wedding because they’re so stressed and busy getting ready. I stayed in a hotel the night before and had a bowl of fruit delivered right when I woke up, then a big brunch before leaving (perks of not wearing a skin tight dress!) I made sure to have protein and complex carbohydrates for long-term energy that would last throughout the day.
Consider your outfit. Obviously comfort isn’t the only priority when it comes to bridal attire, but it is something to keep in mind. Breaking in your shoes prior, avoiding heels that will make your feel swell, and even forgoing shoes all together for an outdoor ceremony are footwear choice to consider. I also knew I’d only last a short amount of time in shape wear, so I packed my maternity spanx in my purse and just threw them on at the venue right before being photographed. They were quickly removed as soon as the wedding was over!

Don’t make it all about baby

While your baby might be a big part of why you’re getting married, your marriage is about the love between you and your partner. It might be nice to mention your growing family in your vows, but make sure you spend the day celebrating the magic between you and your love. You have the rest of your life to be parents - so celebrate where you are now and be there for each other.